My first Deep Soul post after more than a year . . .
And in this past year I really felt like Deep Soul Frozen.
This blog started on my surfing adventure in Portugal in the year of 2012.
That was kind of the hardest year of all the years of my life, as at the end of 2011 my 3-year-old business crashed significantly. Most of it was ofcourse my fault, as it always is. Starting the business before finishing the University, I just predicted that all the costumers will pay their bills . . . in Slovenia. Just how wrong I was. Now I know, it is very possible for companies in Slovenia to even legaly leave some bills not paied and to continue their work like nothing happened, what a great system.
But to make this year subjectivly even harder, I was just finishing a 3-year in a row intensive business building, wrote my diploma to finish University and I was planning the year of 2012 to be a more relaxed, easy year . . . the year of reward for a 3 year hard work.
but there was no reward, just a huge amount of money to pay, even more money to be paid to me…. but that part never happened. I could’ve even pay the money needed if I hadn’t been building the surf van 3 months before and spent a month long surfing trip in Portugal. But the costumers owed me much more money, that I needed to pay, so I haven’t been worried about that . . . untill it was too late. When I came back from Surf tirp portugal in the end of 2011, the biggest costumer we had broke the contract and left us with 6 months of unpaied bills. And I was left with two excess employees and debts.
I was crushed completley. Just when I thought every thing will be more easy . . . more problems came in to my life I could ever imagine having. I still had the company, with quite some orders, but motivation was not present at all. Why work further if this is the result I am getting.
For the first 2 months of that year I was like a vegetable… just going trough day to day, barely having energy to even breathe. I am deeply thatkful to Shinzen Young meditation practice wich broke that loop at that time . Starting to meditate regulary was one of the keys to unfreezing.
So I decided that year, that all I will do is work as hard as I could, save money for paying back most that I could and have 2 really cheap long surf-trips with money I wou for my most needed motivation to take the company to the next level . . .
I really enjoyed the year 2012, now looking back, the hardest year, was the year I grew the most as a person. I reconected with my dream, which is freedom to surf and travel and most importantly the freedom of the mind the spirit and the soul . . .
but for a complete freedom I needed to stabilaze my finaces too. It started to really bother me, when I was writing in my blog all about the freedom, when in reality I knew I was a captive of my debt for some time now.
So at the end of 2012, when I came back from my amazing surf trip in Portugal I decided to freeze the Deep Soul Surfer and dedicate all my energy and motivation to be able to unfreeze it again when true freedom will arrive.
And it was hard, hard, hard work… i turned from a Deep Soul Surfer to a Deep Soul Sufferer… with single goal of unfreezing the Deep Soul again. And i think I overdone my slef last year. My copany really improved, grew and stabilazed. I was able to pay all the debts from the 2011 and the casflow remains growing . . . now I can find some emplyees and relax to such extent that I can rewoke the Deep Soul, which can be a surfer for 2 – 4 months a year . . .
a dream comming closer to being true day by day . . .
And now I am staring feeling to be . . .
trully and absolutely free
Only the Ocean and me
and I can’t see how this would be possible, without the new foundations I’ve build after everthing chrushed . . . I’m now kind of thankful it all happened 😉
Aloha Vibe ;))